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22 June 2011 @ 02:00 pm
Fic: All Their Thinkers, All Their Ghosts (The Killing, Linden, Linden/Holder)  
Title: All Their Thinkers, All Their Ghosts
Fandom/ Pairing: The Killing, Linden, some Linden/Holder
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 788
Summary: This feels, sort of hideously, like heartbreak.
Author's Note: For abvj, who wanted Linden, “next time around”. Spoilers for the season finale.

She lasts a day and a half in Sonoma.

(Surprise, surprise.)

Thirty-six hours and half a dozen unreturned phone calls later she leaves Jack, leaves everything--and she’s back on a plane to Seattle, hands twitching like pale spiders in her lap. The air tastes cold and recycled, like somehow she’s breathing it in reverse.

Oh God, she is going to kill him.

(Although kill him sounds comical, Linden thinks as she gazes out the window at a watery gray expanse of nothing, a funny-papers kind of reaction, and nothing about this feels funny.

This feels, sort of hideously, like heartbreak.)

Holder lives in a shithole, craters in the walls of the stairwell and the garlicky smell of something cooking. Linden thinks she’s seen the inside of enough dingy apartment buildings to last her a lifetime. For a moment she imagines the sun.

“Hey, Linden,” he says, when she bangs her fist police-style against the flaking paint of his front door. He looks unexpectedly tickled for a moment and he grins, crooked and open; then, off her scowl, his face collapses into a sullen kind of apathy, the way Jack looked at her this morning when she left. “What.”

“The photos,” she manages, and his face stays totally impassive but there’s a shift in the look in his eyes, a flicker she might not have noticed if she hadn’t just spent the last two weeks learning his every tell and shudder . She’s not wrong. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” she demands loudly. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Holder?”

“You came all the way back home to ask me that?” Holder raises his eyebrows sort of lazily, that half-predatory smirk. “Really?”

“I came all the way back to Seattle to clean up your mess,” she snaps. “You realize you probably just blew our whole case to hell. If Richmond even killed Rosie Larsen--”

“He killed her. He killed her. He’s a bad guy, Linden.” Holder shakes his head, stubborn, and she thinks again how young he is. “Richmond’s a bad guy.”

“So you just took it upon yourself to--”

“You said we needed a--”

I said--”

“I was trying to give you what--”

“Fuck you, Holder,” because fuck if he’s going to put this on her. No way. No way. It’s too much, all of it is too much, and she shoves him a little, which is idiotic. He’s got a full foot and forty pounds on her even if he is a ridiculous drug-skinny bastard, the heels of her hands bumping his sharp, bony ribs. He’s still wearing that filthy hoodie. “You were trying to give me what, exactly?”

“Linden.” Holder rolls his eyes, his big hands circling her wrists with room to spare, but she’s still thrashing and he pushes back a little, not hard, but enough that her spine hits the wall in the hallway. The door to his apartment swings shut behind him. Probably now he’s locked out, the dumbass. “Linden. Can you stop it? Can you cut that the fuck out, please?”

“We’re supposed to be a team! Damnit, Holder, I thought we were a team,” and maybe she’s as surprised as he is to find that’s what eats at her the most, more than the girl and the teacher and the bone-cracking pointlessness of everything that’s happened. Finally she stops trying to hit him. Linden can feel herself sag.

“We are,” Holder says quietly. He’s still holding her around her wrists, a little tighter now, like he’s trying to keep her from slipping away and landing hard on the dirty linoleum floor. Linden doesn’t fight it. She can feel her own pulse slamming against his fingertips. “We are.”

“We’re not,” she says.

“We are.”

They stare at each other for a minute. His eyes look like a cat’s in the dark. Eventually, finger by careful finger, Holder lets go.

Linden swallows once, hard. “I’m not going to cover for you,” she tells him.

Holder rolls his eyes again, like she is honestly just so thick, like it kills him. “Do you hear me asking you to cover for me? Jesus Christ, Linden.” He digs a cigarette out of his pocket, lights up right in the middle of the hallway. The smoke hangs like a shroud around his face. “What I would like for you to do, honestly, is help me figure out how to get back into my fucking house, if you don’t mind.”

Linden laughs once, she can’t help it. Next door she can hear someone’s TV. She and Holder stand in the hallway for a while, patient, gazing wordlessly at the chipping door.
Cherrii: Sanctuary - John BWcoldwrapped on June 22nd, 2011 06:25 pm (UTC)
Ooh, this is intriguing. Will there be more? (No, I'm not really a stalker or whatever; just a random person who found this trying to google fic for The Killing. Incidentally, do you know where I can find more? Doesn't seem to be any on ffnet, and I'm dying to read more in the long stretch between the finale and whenever season two comes out.)

I like the way you captured the characters here. Neither seems OOC, and it feels entirely plausible. (I'm horrible at good reviews, so I'm sorry. >.>)
lowriseflare: svulowriseflare on June 23rd, 2011 03:48 pm (UTC)
Aw, thanks! I haven't run into any other fic in my travels, but if I come across anything good I'll be sure and send it your way.
Jennsurreallis on June 23rd, 2011 06:11 pm (UTC)
Oooh! Someone wrote fic for The Killing! And it was you!

I really enjoyed that. There's so much to dig into with this show. So much to explore that the show is only really hinting at. And the scene, at the end of the finale, where Linden is just sitting on the plane, knowing what Holder did... Jesus. And I could totally see this happening.
lowriseflare: svulowriseflare on June 23rd, 2011 08:02 pm (UTC)
Hee, it was totally me!

I don't even know if I ship Linden and Holder or not, honestly. I...could probably be convinced? But I kind of don't even need to ship them to enjoy them together, if that makes any sense. In sum: GOD, HOLDER, WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM.
Jenn: svu - liv/el smiling partnerssurreallis on June 24th, 2011 05:55 pm (UTC)
I'm the same way. It's like, I don't actively SHIP them, but at the same time... I don't really NOT ship them either. I like their chemistry and I like seeing them fight and then bond, but I don't maybe want to see them have hot sex? Like... it wouldn't burn my eyes or anything, because if Linden wants it, then it's all good. But... I don't even know.
ambassador of kwanabvj on June 24th, 2011 12:01 am (UTC)
Oh, jesus. Like, if I wasn't 110% in love with you after all that Adam/Christina fic, this would have done me in. I seriously check for new fic for this show EVERYWHERE at least once every few weeks and nothing ever comes up, but that's okay now, I think, because I have this. And this is exactly what I imagine happening because Linden was never going to stay in Sonoma and Holder isn't dirty just... did the wrong thing, and yeah, you've captured how truly fucked up these two people are it's lovely. Really, really lovely.

So, yeah. Thank-you.
lowriseflarelowriseflare on June 25th, 2011 10:05 pm (UTC)
Hurray, so glad you liked (this and the wretched RPF both!)

You know, from a storytelling perspective I get why they needed Linden to have someplace else to be to like, ratchet up the urgency, but on the other hand I did not believe she actually wanted to be going there for one second. Maybe they should have made her fiance hotter or something, I don't know.
ambassador of kwanabvj on June 29th, 2011 06:21 pm (UTC)
I didn't buy her leaving either. I get it, but I didn't buy it because that is not who Linden is and I was honestly a little surprised by the fact that she did go to Somona. Also, her fiance was UGLY!!! I wouldn't have moved to Somona either, if my finace looked like that!

(I would apologize for my superficiality, but I think you already knew that about me. And if you didn't, you do now! lol)
lightning rod for criticism: dlew: luminousannakovsky on June 24th, 2011 11:44 pm (UTC)
Oh man, I am kind of iffy on The Killing as a show, but I am not iffy on this fic! THIS IS AWESOME.
lowriseflare: svulowriseflare on June 25th, 2011 10:08 pm (UTC)
There is something distinctly undercooked about The Killing, and I cannot put my finger on exactly what. Because I really, REALLY like the idea of it, for it to be like, the anti-SVU, but then if you're going to make that your goal then why do I feel like you just spent 11 episodes holding me at arm's length? IN ANY CASE, Holder is sort of creepily attractive to me, Stan/Bobby is a heartbreaker, and I am super glad you dug this :)
Too Cool For a Portmanteau: Linden and Holderdevlinacardigan on July 8th, 2011 02:20 am (UTC)
I may or may not have let out a shriek when I saw fanfic for these two.

Anyway, piggy backing off one of your other comments, these two are one of the few couples I like as a platonic friendship (and they should always stay that way on the show, imo) as well as in a shipper sense (where oh where is the fanfic?). They've got a really interesting dynamic that you captured well.
lowriseflare: swarthy swareklowriseflare on July 8th, 2011 01:40 pm (UTC)
Yay! So glad you liked. I wish there was more Linden/Holder in the world.
petragem on July 29th, 2013 02:51 pm (UTC)
Well hey, this was everything I'd hoped it would be and more! The line it feels sort of hideously like heartbreak hit me right in the heart space, also Linden leaving Sonoma to ream out Holder, his filthy hoodie, she thought they were a team / they are a team. Plus I can hear them saying the words to each other, soooo: well done, you champion writer person, you.